I Believe an Introduction is in Order.

Gentlemen. Ladies. Welcome to A Single Man's Diary. You can call me Duke. This diary will only be posted on by your's truly with 100% genuine stories about my interactions or observations with the opposite sex, unless told otherwise. Some of what you may read will be of sexual nature, and possibly offensive. If you feel you have to comment, go right ahead, what's done is done. I will also give you suggestions of what I have learned from my many dealings with women. All the people mentioned will be given aliases to keep their identities secret. I will post a different case (my interactions with a specific woman) at least once a month, and will start from the beginning. These cases will not necessarily be in order of when they occurred, but I'll do my best. Since some of the subjects of cases appear in the recalling of other cases, I may use different aliases in different cases, but I will never use the same alias for two different subjects. When referring to a subject's "best friend" I will use the name Diamond. When referring to a subject's "ex" I will use the name Squid. I hope you enjoy your stay, and return back soon.

Monday, January 2, 2012

Subject Zero. Code Name: Eraser. Extra Life. Part 2.

Sometimes life gives everyone second chances, fuck those lucky few get all the chances in the world and don't know what to do with them, but still those who use them with care tend to get the best results possible.

Time passes, with me bouncing from girl to girl. No foundations being laid, and myself when times were good. Yet somehow I had a small idea to re-open the Case of Subject Zero. All it took was a simple text message. See the thing was, her and I lived in rather close proximity, and would randomly text one another even though I was so brutal on the breaking her off. “Yo do you need a ride home from work today? ;P” All it took.

Not to my surprise though, as females do so easily, she tried to pick up right from where we left off (before the whole me cutting her off). I gave her one ride home and she felt everything would just fall back into place. Trying to plan a picnic. Inviting me to dinner with two other friends. I was honestly the boyfriend who never got any. If it was Christmas break, and she was single, she would have me with her most of the week. If she was planning a dinner with her best friend, and her best friend wasn’t single, I would have to tag alone and be her date. It was a process that re-occurred over and over again. I let it blindly happen to me. This time though it would be different. I told her that I didn't want things to cycle back to the way they were. Putting the foundation down right away before she could get any ideas. I made her a deal, that her and I would get together and talk.

She figures this talk will be simply a repeat of last time, where I’ll tell her how I can’t be her friend anymore, blah blah blah. On the other hand I plan on actually making a move on her. Yes in the 5 years her and I were friends, I never made a move. Making a move is really the only way you can judge what sort of position you are in relationship wise. All I had to do was kiss her and she would have to make the next move for once. Whether it be ending the friendship or taking it forward, at least I would have done all that I could.

This planning the talk seemed to be harder than the French trying to hold on German in World War II. Every single time her and I made plans to do it, something came on either on my side or hers. But as luck giving this the second chance would have it a random chain of event gave me the opportunity I needed.

I get a text message in the middle of the night saying that she had missed her bus and needed a ride. I dropped her off just on the street next to hers. Even though she was in her 20’s she lived at home, and the parents didn’t approve of motorcycles. So we are walking, and as per usually messing with each other. Trying to flick each other in the nose. As we get wrapped up in one another’s arms (trying to prevent the flicking) I went in for a kiss… And as luck would have it, before I move an inch into the six inch distance between our lips she points out she believes she sees her family walker her dog. I turn my head to see them, not in the far distance. A perfect moment shattered by bad luck. To see the bright side, at least I had only begun the long haul to her lips, not like I was already halfway there. So next time would surely still be a surprise…
*POINTER* Kiss her. Don’t wait too long. If you go three dates without giving the girl a kiss goodnight she may think you’re not interested. I would almost always kiss on the first date, unless the girl is rather shy, then I wait for the second. Kissing the girl is very much like asking the girl out. If she is feeling that after the first date, she likes you, it won’t hurt to do it, but if she isn’t, it can actually save you the cost on date number 2.

Thursday, October 6, 2011


I really didn't think it would be this hard literally. Normally I have a daily regiment that keep my sexual drive in control, but because of this all out celibacy, a girl gives me a hug, I'm gunna pull a semi-chub. I wake up and salute for an hour and can't do anything about it. I dreamt about going to a restaurant with a friend and the waitress was quite insistent about giving me a handjob and than for me to take her right there.

I'm on what? 3 days? Its making my mind go mad. And it would figure that I managed to get this really hot asian chick to start going out with me, but I can't even do anything really, for the whole month.... oh blue ball here I cum.

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Attempting Celibacy

Women are fantastic. I know if I put my mind to it I can get a woman. The thing I really have never tried is being celibate. I know there is such thing called the 7 day challenge, where an individual cannot engage in an form of sexual activities, including sex, masturbation, or any form. I think I have done this challenge before while on the road, but I was thinking I can do this for 30 days.

So completely legit. I shall do my best to do 30 days of celibacy. I will post everyday during this month, and if I do fail you all, I will explain in detail on why it happened. Don't worry I won't let myself succum to my hand or anything like that, only way I will fail this is if I am approached with a offer I cannot refuse.

I hope you all wish me luck with this expedition of mine, and I hope by the end of this I can conquer desire, and sexual longing.

Friday, September 30, 2011

Duke Talks - Wealth VS Status

Ignoring the whole dance around of women saying it’s what’s inside that counts, or that it’s the connection between one another that cannot be described with word. No, it can be boiled down to one of two things. Wealth or Status. Now wealth is rather straight forward, it’s your money, how much you are actually worth, but status on the other hand can’t just be distilled into what you do for a living, what country club you are a part of, or even what class you are in. It’s all about the image of status. A guy that drives up in an Audi R8 may really not have the wealth or the job to support the car. Better yet, maybe the car is just leased, or even borrowed from a friend of his fathers. It’s the image the girl gets when she sees him drive up in the R8 that sticks in her brain. For first impressions the image of status is everything, but later in the dating process, image tends to need some back up.
When meeting a girl at the club it’s easy to act like you have the wealth and status that the girl is looking for, but there comes a problem once you have won her over enough to at least leave the club with you. Yes you can keep the image of your status up by instead of bringing her back to your place you bring her to a fancy hotel (that is if you some how did not convince her that going to her place would be better). At this point the two tend to cross over. You can still lie about your status in the world, as long as you have the money to back it up. With wealth you can pay your way into making those around you think you are important, like those whom have money tend to do. But with status you don’t need the money, take the founder of Napster, they guy went broke after Napster fell, but he could go into a club with not a dime, flash his name around and get some.
I know this entry has become a bit of a ramble-a-thon, but what I want you to learn from this is, that you can fake it from the start to get with a girl, but if you either really have to be smart or just have the money to back it up. All and all I believe wealth will always win this battle, though you will have a hard time differentiating the difference between those you like you for you, or those who like you for your bank account, it’s clear that money is what makes the world go round.

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Random Entries: Mornings

 Normally a morning can be a great thing, it’s the beginning of the day, where anything can happen, but then again if your brother came home to visit, stayed up until 3 hours before you had to get to work, that morning can be just a bad experience. The smell of freshly brewed coffee filled the room and the heart attack of an alarm clock shocked my ears, I sprang from my bed in a sleep drunken phase. My cat was calling me for food as he normally did, and so I went to get him what he wanted. You know when you put your hand on the wall when you lean over so that you don’t fall. Well I attempted such a feet, where as my hand slipped from its position on the wall and broke through the laundry basket in my bathroom, the food I was giving my cat flew to cover as much ground as it could, and I face planted right into the side of my now broken laundry basket. Mornings are great when you wake up unconscious enough to face plant into a piece of furniture, brush yourself off and continue on with your already going well morning.

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

The Thinker

Everyone in this world has been single at one time or another, and for most of us it can be hard at times bridging the gap between being single and entering the dating world once more. The greatest thing that separates us from being single and dating someone is thinking instead of doing. There are truly only three stages of your relationship status, single, dating, married. When one is single, you can’t sit around thinking. I am currently single and I have thought millions of times on what I should do, should I go and talk to that girl? What would I say? What if she rejects me? What if she has a boyfriend? What if she is actually a he? Sitting there thinking got me nowhere, the only time I began to date as a thinker was when the girl made the first move, and trust me that doesn’t happen often (usually once a year for me). When one is single, you must only do one thing, and that is DO! Do Veronica, Ashlee, Michelle, and even do Elizabeth. I know I am coming off as a pig, but my point is if you don’t go do something (breaking the ice with a girl) you won’t get anything. After all the player that doesn’t take the shot, never scores. Thinking is for being in a marriage, when you have kids, then you can think, like was this the right choice, should I send my kids to private school, all the fun things…..

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

The girl at the coffee shop

Alright, this is more of a discussional piece. If you are sitting in a cafĂ©, and make eye contact with a girl you think you fancy, do you approach her?  What do you say? Well chances are if she is alone she is either waiting for someone, or has major anti-social tendencies, or is studying and doesn’t want to be bothered. If we break down each situation to basic facts, we will be able to determine whether or not to approach.

Situation 1, she is waiting for someone. This “someone” could be anyone from a date, to a family member, to a friend. If she looks impatient don’t approach. This usually means that this impatience is due to the fact that the lateness of who she is meeting is definitely unintended. If it were a friend, chance are she would have got a message from them, or would be used to this person being late. Same principle could be applied if it were a family member. The fact she is outwardly portraying this impatience it means that either it’s important to her that this person was there, or that it is a date. Therefore impatience is a bad thing. Plus if you notice she comes in, sits down, without a drink and waits, it means she is waiting for someone. If she gets a drink after sitting alone for some time, it means this person is late, you could always use the opportunity to approach her, once you have defined the fact she is not going to wait for that person to get her drink.

Situation 2, if she does have major anti-social tendencies it becomes a attempt at your own risk. She’ll either like you or not. Once you approach it becomes her move, and you can just hope for the best.

Situation 3, if she’s studying/working find a good reason to bug her. It can be a dumb, but good reason. For example, does she mind sharing the outlet she is using for her laptop, you get the picture right? It will be up to you entirely to get the conversational ball rolling, because she could really careless to talk to you on the fact she’s busy, but if you can get the ball rolling your pretty much in the clear.

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